Read each statement, and then answer yes or no.

  1. When I fail at something important to me, I become consumed by feelings of inadequacy.
  2. I try to be understanding and patient toward those aspects of my personality that I don’t like.
  3.  When something painful happens, I try to take a balanced view of the situation.
  4. When I’m feeling down, I tend to feel like most other people are probably happier than I am.
  5.  I try to see my failings as part of the human condition.
  6.  When I’m going through a very hard time, I give my-self the caring and tenderness I need.
  7.  When something upsets me, I try to keep my emotions in balance.
  8.  When I fail at something that’s important to me, I tend to feel alone in my failure.
  9.  When I’m feeling down, I tend to obsess and fixate on everything that’s wrong.
  10.  When I feel inadequate in some way, I try to remind myself that feelings of inadequacy are shared by most people.
  11.  I‘m disapproving and judgmental about my own flaws and inadequacies.
  12. I’m intolerant and impatient toward those aspects of my personality I don’t like.

    First, make a note of the answers you recorded to questions 2, 3, 5, 6, 7, 10.

These are indicators of self-compassion. If you filled in these blanks with a lot of yeses, you probably tend to be kind to yourself even when things aren’t going your way.

Second, tally your answers for questions 1, 4, 8, 9, 11, 12. If you answered yes to these, you’re probably one to beat yourself up over anything you feel that you don’t get right (like quiz answers!).

Try cutting yourself some slack. Look for ways to appreciate your efforts and errors instead of coming down so hard on yourself and you’ll live a healthier, happier life. 


Questions reprinted with permission from Kristin Neff and